Ducklings and humans
October 10, 2009 – 9:09 am
- Muscovy ducklings
Watching the ducklings one afternoon I was struck by their individuality. Twenty-one different personalities all from two broods, fledged together on the grass as the mothers stood by grazing.
First to stand out was the bully who chased anyone he could, hissing and biting the whole time. Next were the victims of the bully, running for cover, not one daring enough to fight back.
Some were already paired together, not as mates but as friends. There were curious ducklings and dull ducklings, some eating voraciously and others half asleep.
There were leaders and followers. Some preened as others got dirty.
I couldn’t help but see the human parallel. We highly evolved humans think ourselves immune to such innate characteristics, but there is little difference between us. Sure we can learn to act differently than our given nature dictates, but underneath we are still who we are. We are still bullies and victims, preeners and dirt-daubers, gluttons and dainties.
I think we get ourselves into trouble when we forget this important fact. When we begin to see our actions as true representations of ourselves, no matter how contrary they may be to our thoughts and intentions, we start to lose awareness of who we really are. Then we begin to think that we are better than others simply because we act better.
Food for thought.
3 Responses to “Ducklings and humans”
I take great satisfaction in improving my attitudes and [re]actions, but it doesn’t feel like superiority.
And doesn’t Buddhism teach that we should try to overcome our “lesser” selves all the time? You just aren’t supposed to feel superior to the innately good person when you accomplish that goal. I thought the whole point of working at acting better was to “become” better ~ not constantly be reminding oneself that the new is fake and the old is who we really are.
AA does work that way though. Once an alcoholic, always an alcoholic, even if you never drink again. A lifelong hair shirt of humility.
By Hartley on Oct 10, 2009
I believe the real key is not in acting differently but in healing that which creates the defect in the first place. In other words, a bully is simply someone who is afraid of being worthy. Thus he pushes people around to control the outcome of his environment.
If he heals the fear of his wounded self-esteem, he longer desires to be the bully.
I think the actualized AA premise is that we all have character defects that cause compulsive behaviors. Healing those defects helps us live in harmony with our true selves. Unfortunately, most people have to be addicts or alcoholics to discover this wisdom. But if you really think about it, it’s the same pattern for compulsive anger, spending, eating, disconnecting, withdrawling, etc.
My point is that “acting” better than we truly are is one tool to help change our behavior, but if we fail to heal the underlying defects that cause such compulsive behaviors, we never really change. We simply trade one bad habit for another. The bully may act sweet but the whole time he’s probably seething with new resentments because he isn’t being honest with himself. At some point these new resentments will create new pain and he will explode in rage. The bully will reappear because it never got fixed, only temporarily concealed.
By Trish on Oct 10, 2009
Cordrays feed on Johns Island had a lone duckling looking for a new home today. It seems he was beating up on the guineas so he/she needs a new home…
By Casey on Oct 10, 2009