Tinkerbell Attitude
February 18, 2010 – 9:26 am
Preparing for the Hat Tea
Ever do something that takes you completely out of your comfort zone? Used to be that I would be the one on the sidelines watching everyone “make fools of themselves.” I’d say things like “you’d never catch me dead in that outfit,” or “who does she think she is in those heels?” The dialogue went on and on as I separated myself from everyone with a quiet disdain.
But then life shifted. I began to notice that life on the sidelines was pretty boring. Sure I was safe from ridicule, but I certainly wasn’t having the fun that others seemed to be having.
One day while sharing these thoughts with a friend, she wisely posed this question, “What makes you think it’s all about you?”
As obvious as that sounds, it had never occurred to me that I was making every situation about me. And as long as I did, I was comparing myself to others and therefore judging them the same way I assumed they were judging me. This seems to be a very female trait. We’re all so worried about being pretty enough, elegant enough, sexy enough, smart enough….. that we insidiously begin to project that on others in an effort to ease our personal burden. But it backfires every time. Inevitably, there will always be someone better, prettier, sexier, smarter, more successful and someone else, usually you, will come up short.
So what to do? For me, I’m learning to do things anyway, despite the knot in the gut or the angst of measurements. I’m practicing awareness of judgment and laughing at my “tinkerbell” attitude.
Tinkerbell is known for saying “it’s all about me.” In a way, she’s right. It is all about me but now I know that doesn’t mean that everyone is judging me. If they are, that’s their problem. Now it means that my attitude towards myself and others is completely within my control. If I have a bad day, it’s my fault. If I have a good day it’s my doing. But it begins with letting go of the fear of what others think in the first place and embracing the concept that true happiness begins within.
Happy Day
2 Responses to “Tinkerbell Attitude”
Methinks there will be many non-Tinkerbells at the hat tea!!
By Beth Smoak on Feb 18, 2010
The HAT has to be more Mad Hatter, and as for Tink… I always clap to save her.
By Hartley on Feb 18, 2010