Falling leaves in springtime
March 14, 2010 – 11:54 am
Reflective audience
No matter how long I live down here I still cannot adjust to leaves falling in the springtime. I find myself resisting the urge to yell at mother nature and tell her that her timing is way off track! I imagine a silly dialogue. A Taoist lesson if you will…
Me: “Leaves fall in October, not March!”
Mother Nature: “Oh yeah. Says who?”
“Says me!”
“And who are you?”
“I am a little peon who thinks she can control the universe with my opinions.”
“And why is it so important to control the universe?”
“Because knowing what to expect keeps me safe from harm, allows me to plan and be productive.”
“In other words, you are a simple person who needs the structure of logic to live a happy life?”
“Yes.”
“And if I upset your logical order, you can no longer function?”
“Well, if you put it that way, I can but it’s much harder.”
“So when logic fails you, you cannot trust something bigger than yourself?”
“Like what, God?”
“Maybe…or maybe just something bigger than logic, bigger than emotions, bigger than you.”
“So if I’m not in control of the universe, then what I am in control of?”
“Your response to the universe. That’s it. Nothing else.”
“And that’s supposed to be enough?”
“Yes.”
“But what about my plans, my hopes and dreams, my vocation?”
“You are only here to experience life as a human being with all of its foibles and all of its wonderful encounters. To love and hurt, to laugh and cry, to experience the full spectrum of what is available to you and to accept that everything that happens is…
“Is what?”
“Just is….”
“I think it’s easier to curse the leaves…”
“Sure it is. But you are bigger than that. You can do more than that.”
“Like what?”
“Like laugh at yourself when you want to curse the leaves, or rush the dawn or push back the night.”
“In other words, accept what is and keep going?”
“Yes, that’s a start. Then your whole world will change and you will begin to see things differently.”
“Like how?”
“Well once you really accept that you cannot stop the leaves from falling you will learn to enjoy them as they fall.”
“Savor what I have you mean?”
“Enjoy it without wanting to possess it forever. Enjoy it as you have it knowing that you will only have it for a brief moment before that too ends.”
“But that’s so painful, enjoying it knowing that it’s going to end, to go away.”
“The pain depends on what you are trying to keep, the happiness those things bring or the things themselves.”
“I don’t understand.”
“No, but you are beginning to…”
“How?”
“Just by having these conversations….”
